Early Bird Special

I recently had an epiphany.  I should be given the honorary old lady name of Rose (or how about Edith?).

Reason 1:  I watch my stories daily.  Sure, it's done in a high-tech way on Wii Netflix (which is a lifesaver btw) but it's how I get my jollies (reason number 2, I just said 'jollies')

Reason 3:  I have an array of Rx bottles and pill boxes that I tote around with me since I am now a regular at the pharmacy counter.

Reason 4:  A majority of my anecdotes include my nurses, not my friends and a completely different type of shot.

Reason 5:  Rufus and Marley, need I say more?

Reason 6:  I have been known to say the phrase "Oh my aching back" due to over sitting and laying in "slug" position watching said stories.

Reason 7:  I have been known to have my hand on my chest as if saying the pledge of allegiance due to acid reflux.  Simply, I have acid reflux.  I thought I'd get that at the same time I buy a cherry red Mazda Miata during my planned midlife crisis.

Reason 8:  There is a stock of Ensure in my house.

Reason 9:  I am a crossword queen.  I complete the Red Eye crossword, and I have a book of them which I tote around as well.

Reason 10:  I grumble under my breath and grimace like a crotchety old man about the yippety little dog next door.  (It truly needs to be snuffed.)

Reason 11:  Walking is my exercise.  I don my Sketchers Shape Ups (I'll take all the help I can get when it comes to getting my booty back in shape) and stroll the country club.  The other walkers I see are either the local new mommies or the 65 and better crowd.

Reason 12:  I drank prune juice.  It was only once but I think it makes me eligible for an AARP card.  That stuff is gross enough that anyone drinking it deserves a discount.

... if I name anymore similarities I may start to develop worry lines.  Let's stop here so that it's still smile lines.

Rock(er) on!